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Hena Ashraf's Short Film Takes A Fun Swipe at Tinder Date Selfies. August 31, Share on Facebook · +1 · Share on Twitter · Share. Shot on the UCLA. Nov 10, “It was an article in which you talk about how difficult it is to date,” he continued. “I don't understand. You're smart, attractive, and confident. Aug 31, Hena Ashraf's Short Film Takes A Fun Swipe at Tinder Date Selfies Trash is making fun of this online dating culture and also takes a critical look Find her on Twitter at @_pavani, and follow The Aerogram at . Yahoo Mail.
When we broke up ten years ago, we made bets on who would get married first. He was convinced it would be me. He wanted to be the perpetual playboy. I was convinced that I would never find anyone to love after him. He reached out a couple of times a year to see how I was doing. We were good like that, at least. We met when were both in our early twenties working as community organizers in Washington, D.
He grew up in a well-to-do family in an idyllic community just outside of D. They had oil paintings on the wall, candlesticks on the dining table, and ordered steak through the mail. In the petri dish of our relationship, I noticed how his white privilege compared to my lack thereof. To my family, he was a secret. But his family welcomed me with open arms.
His grandmother made aloo gobi for me at Thanksgiving. I helped unwrap heirloom ornaments for their Christmas tree. During those years, I was also learning about what it means to be a person of color and how white supremacy plays out in the U. I had overwhelming student loans, made much less money then him, and in those years right after September 11th, I stopped being able to fly and was harassed on those Washington, D.
Though it was comforting to be in a relationship, I still had to explain a lot of what it meant for me to feel exoticized, persecuted, and marginalized. Around the election season cycle, our relationship started getting tense.
I saw how easily he navigated it all. How he gained access to power, funding, resources. How I had to struggle twice as hard to raise a quarter of the funding. How they were scared of communities of color gaining power, even in a progressive organizing space.
I hated the feeling of constantly being reminded of how little power I had as a woman of color. Our relationship came to an explosive end near election day I promised myself that I would never actively date a white man again.
I needed to get on solid ground on what it meant to be a Desi, an American, and a racial justice activist. It felt hypocritical to my political beliefs to be dating white. Most importantly, my career was about training and educating people on social justice issues. The last thing I wanted to do was come home to a space where I had to continue to educate. I wanted to be in a relationship where I could be my full self, no explanation or education needed.
Hena Ashraf's Short Film Takes A Fun Swipe at Tinder Date Selfies - The Aerogram
How could I be in a relationship with a person who constantly reminded me of how much I was lacking? We broke up because he cheated on me.
And the chances of them being not stupid is really slim. I would marry anything but white. Person of color, only. What if you are in loooove? Was Mom advocating for a love marriage with a white man? It will be a constant reminder of his white privilege and the lack of mine.
Preferably, some kind of brown. Someone who is good. I know they exist, because I see all these older women married to really good guys, but you know?
All I find are the stupid ones. You live your life you die, and people remember you for what, 6 months? Even people like Gandhi.
What is life really, anyways? Passing becomes of the utmost importance. Pretending to have privilege is paramount. How what you thought was a middle class home will be perceived as less than when viewed by privileged eyes. How will they even communicate? Will he remember not to touch you or kiss you while they are watching? You wonder if you pass enough. You wonder if your first date outfit says attractive or exudes cheap.
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Hena Ashraf’s Short Film Takes A Fun Swipe at Tinder Date Selfies
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