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So after leaving Joburg as a single mother, I moved to Cape Town to start a new life with my two boys. I also thought it was time to dabble in the dating field and see if I can make new friends. Janice Johannes is IOL's social media officer. What i found was that when a single mother starts dating again, we are treated differently than women who don't have kids.
First thing that I am always asked when I tell a guy that I have been single since is: Honestly, like I am a car that needs to be started every morning so the engine can still work. Another question that comes up too often is: Why do they assume that I - the woman - must have done something wrong? Why do they always lay the blame on the woman for being a single mother? When a guy finds out that I have two boys, he will almost always ask: This boggles my mind What happened to chivalry?100 free online dating site in south africa
A guy once asked me: So I had to find out if I was simply a magnet for douchebags, or if other single moms are experiencing the same horrors. So I asked the women who are part of my singles group about their dating experiences as single moms. Waltina says that most guys are just after one thing: I never really dated since my divorce, 12 years ago.
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I went on a few dates, but that's it. I am turning 44 in a month's time. Waltina Baron Johnston I have two daughters, aged 25 and I got married when I turned My eldest daughter was three at the time.
My ex-husband was my first boyfriend. We were raised that we must marry the man who "messed you up", got you pregnant. I saw cracks in our relationship before we got married, but I clung to the idea of getting married to my child's father.
Needless to say, almost 10 years and another child later, we got divorced. For a while after the divorce, I was stuck in the stigma of being a divorced single mom. Guys pursued me, and I went on a few dates, never more than once with the same guy. They seemed to be interested in only one thing. They couldn't understand why you don't want to give it up, you already have children.
There might have been one or two who seemed different, but being the person I am, because of what I've been through, I just messed it up before it could even begin to develop into anything. I also felt I could not bring another man into my house. I was raising two girls and their father was my first and only boyfriend.
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I am not closed to the idea of dating though. I'm a born again Christian, and if I do start dating again, I will not engage in premarital sex.
Colleen says that men compete with your kids for attention: