DIVORCE, AFFAIRS, WIFE SELLING AND VIETNAMESE WOMEN MARRYING FOREIGN MEN | Facts and Details
Oct 23, Internet at 40 In a student typed 'LO' on a computer - and the internet was born. a few days after Woodstock, and a month before the first broadcast of stage since the Vietnam war ended; the cold war escalated then declined; travel agencies, dating and retail; and unless you're a specialist. Sep 10, What happened when two 'painfully cool' New York hipsters dated each other for 40 days and blogged about every single moment of their affair. Timothy Goodman and Jessica Walsh's artificial dating experiment had an important message As a result, 40 Days of Dating was doomed from the outset.
As he and the chaperones discussed her fate in Hokkien, her eyes darted about anxiously. But no, she was too young, he decided. On the third day, he saw another woman and took an instant shine to her. But something else got in the way -- they were both born under the same Chinese zodiac sign of the ram, which he feared would mean a rocky marriage.
In the end, Mr Poh left to return to Singapore, resigned to leave it till another day to select his Vietnamese bride. Dam Psi Kin Sa went to Taiwan nine years ago, at the age of 20, and married a Taiwanese car wash owner more than twice her age who had been divorced three times. She met him through a matchmaking service.
Five years later, her husband demanded a divorce and locked her out of the house. Even though she had learned his language, Mandarin Chinese, the couple had trouble communicating. The Vietnamese police say that since there is no law banning Vietnamese women from marrying foreigners, there is little they can do to stop the practice. They say that if the women do manage to get some money out of their new husbands they often send it back to their families in Vietnam.
As a result, many of the families are reluctant to tell the police what has happened. The women, aged between 18 to 36, were sent back to their home provinces, mostly in the southern Mekong Delta, he said. The Thanh Nien Young People newspaper quoted one of the women, a year-old, as saying she wanted to look for a foreign husband to help her family. Police detained the Vietnamese couple who were organizing the business from a house in Ho Chi Minh City and sent the women back to their home towns, mostly in the poor Mekong Delta region.
Forty years of the internet: how the world changed for ever | Technology | The Guardian
The couple had arranged about 40 marriages over more than four years and charged three million dong dollars for each successful match. While businesses offering brides are hardly rare, the idea of using eligible young virgins as workers while they wait for husbands is almost certainly unique.
At first, the factory hired scouts to scour the countryside for "suitable" virgin village girls they could advertise for foreign bachelors through their agencies in countries like Singapore, Taiwan, South Korea and Malaysia. Parents bring their daughters to them. Girls like willowy year-old Huynh Thi Phuong Thuy put up with long shifts sewing shirts and gluing shoes hoping it is a first step to marriage.
Ms Phuong Thuy got what she wanted.
She married a year-old Singaporean storeman last July and now lives in Jurong. In fact, there is strict "quality" control.
New arrivals are given the once-over by matronly female supervisors who look out for telltale signs of previous pregnancies, such as stretch marks or caesarean scars. Those who fail are sent back. Those chosen are given a medical examination to check their hymen is still intact. After being hired, the women are expected to work hard and behave well.
Female supervisors at the factory penalise lazy, talkative or rebellious girls by barring them from matchmaking sessions.
No work, no husband. They have to be obedient to their husbands. But despite the long hours, most village girls find life at the factory easier than working in the paddy fields, plantations or shrimp farms back home, where many of them had no electricity or running water, ate one meal a day and bathed in river or rainwater.
The girls are given photographs of the men and they choose whether they want to go for the matchmaking session. After that, the decisions are down to the men.
The process can be brutal. In one case, 2, girls wanted to be set up with a Taiwanese businessman. It sounds degrading, but Wong insists the young women are willing. For many of them, this is their only chance to break out of poverty," he said. Out of the 3, girls working at the factory, only about get hitched each year. The prettier ones usually get chosen within six months, while some have gone for more than matchmaking sessions without success.
The oldest worker there is a year-old seamstress, who faithfully works her shifts and lives in hope of being picked one day. Grant McCool of Reuters wrote: Sharp beeps or vibrations on a married man's mobile phone can elicit quips about "the cat" lover calling.
Research on youth by a variety of organizations show that young people are sexually active at the same age as their parents, but the difference is that their parents were married and they are not.
According to Faheymiddle-class urban women often confide during informal interviews that their husbands have a mistress or entertain several girlfriends. Encyclopedia of Sexuality, 2. Quite telling is the gusto with which this story was spread by European authors. The early Annamite Code contained the following article: A Vietnamese woman can cheat in the Western sense on her husband without regret, as long as it is not known.
The following saying illustrates the point: District police chief Tran Dinh Thich from the central city of Danang said the names of people caught in adulterous acts would be displayed in media. Thousands of "resting houses" have sprung up around Vietnam, catering to unmarried couples seeking to circumvent taboos on co-habitation and pre-marital sex in the conservative south-east Asian country. State employees violating the rules will be reported to their offices.
Bao Thi Lieu and Nguyen Thi Chien, girlfriends since childhood, switched their husbands in the mids after working with the other's spouse on a rubber plantation, according to the Thanh Nien Young People newspaper. The paper laid out the story of Ms Chien and Ms Lieu, who each found themselves working with the other's spouse in what Ms Chien called the "lonely rubber forests".
The women have since moved in with the other's husband, with both giving birth to children from the new unions. InXinhua reported: As many as 63 percent of writers of the applications for divorces are women, it added.
The numbers of divorced young couples and couples aged more than 55 have increased over the past few years. Major causes for their divorces are adultery and economic conflicts between husbands and wives.
Vietnam reportedcases of divorces from to Causes included domestic violence with most of the victims being women, adultery and disputes among family members. Xinhua, November 4, ] AFP reported: The figure for and will be sharply higher, say committee officials. Before divorce was rare as traditionally Vietnamese women have been subservient to their husbands, devoting their lives to raising children and serving their spouse as well as his parents, grandparents and other relatives.
One blogger wrote on XUVN.
Vietnamese couples have only three ways to change the status of their marriage: Legal separation allows spouses to live separately but they may not remarry. Declaration of nullity presupposes that the marriage is void from the beginning and the court declares its non-existence. Annulment legally cancels the marriage and both spouses are restored to their single status. Divorce is uncommon among Vietnamese in both countries, though in Vietnam the divorce rate is lower than in the U.
DIVORCE, AFFAIRS, WIFE SELLING AND VIETNAMESE WOMEN MARRYING FOREIGN MEN
This can partly be attributed to the values of a patriarchal society and that the notion of marrying for life is more pervasive. A man is considered responsible for his spouse until death. In Vietnam, the husband is the most powerful member of the family who makes the major decisions and brings in the primary income. Arnett of Knight-Ridder Tribune News wrote: Yes, her ex-husband drank too much, his gambling debts drained her savings, he brazenly cheated on her, including with the woman who lived across the hall, and he even threatened to kill her.
But when Ngoc Dung Pham filed for divorce in Vietnam inputting up with a miserable marriage may actually have been better than what she had to endure by leaving him. For centuries, women seeking divorce in Vietnam subjected themselves to a lifetime of public scorn, disgraced their whole household, and doomed their children's hopes for marriage into good families.
Just a year after Pham suffered through that humiliation, the rigid taboo against divorce began to crumble. Since then, divorce in Vietnam has become nearly as common as it is in the United States.
The divorce rate is highest in Ho Chi Minh City -- old Saigon -- where an estimated two out of every five couples split. In perhaps the biggest sign of change, about half the divorces these days are initiated by women. When the communists took over the North in and the South inthey tried to make men and women equal partners in marriage, but it didn't work.
The ancient legacy of men behaving badly stuck. So did the taint on women seeking divorce. The simple answer is economics. But the real explanation is more complicated. Desperate to lift its limp economy, the communist government decided in to ease its state-controlled grip over commerce and allow some private enterprise. The idea was to get an infusion of Western money.
But the Vietnamese government also got a few things it didn't expect. A deluge of Western books, movies, and music trickled into the culture, spreading new attitudes about love, individuality, free will -- and instant gratification.
Sociologists said these shocking, indulgent ideas were greedily absorbed by much of the public. Many Vietnamese, suffering for decades from wartime depravations, now had comfort for the first time in their lives. Comfort gave them the chance to think about something other than day-to-day subsistence. That led them to think about their own needs and desires.
They had no intention of reverting to the cultural dark ages. In the once-repressive society that frowned on public displays of affection, the new social order meant more hand-holding and necking in public, and more premarital sex and abortions in private. It also meant that divorce was no longer as much of a stigma.
For the five years between andwhen divorce was still discouraged, Vietnam courts recorded a total of about 28, divorces. In alone, the first year of the dramatic economic reform, the court registered 29, divorce cases. Bythe most recent year that statistics were available, there were 44, divorces granted.
While the population was also rising during this time, sociologists say the rate of divorce far outpaced the rate of population growth. She met her ex-husband when she was 17, a senior in high school.
He was 24, and had just come back from the army. He seemed worldly, handsome and tall. She was pretty then, too. A young woman with a shy smile. Finally, they had to fill in a questionnaire at the end of every day and document their relationship.
They both treated the whole thing fairly analytically at first, like a science experiment with cocktails and cutesy little notes they write to each other before their dates. But then, after about a week, it starts to get interesting — mainly because they start to actually fancy each other.
Vietnam | ordendelsantosepulcro.info
She, in turn, freaks out even more. He gets a bit turned on because surprise, surprise, he likes crazy ladies, and spends a lot of time trying to not crack on to her. At this point the blog has all the makings of a second-rate Jane Austen novel minus the social comedy. Admittedly about 80 per cent of the relationship peril could have been avoided if they stopped obsessing over every little thought and feeling they had, and then discussing it in therapy.
So why was it so addictive? So compelling that the blog started to go viral — after the first couple of weeks - with up topeople a day were tuning in to see if they were finally going sleep do the deed. And hallelujah, on day they Do It. Cue much cheering, whooping and fist pumping from their many followers.