Bill Engvall - Wikiquote
Ron White. 4. Truth In Advertising. Ron White. 5. Tubing. Ron White. 1: 52 Year-Old Daughter. Bill Engvall Jeff Foxworthy/Bill Engvall/Ron White/ Larry The Cable Guy. 34 Dating & Marriage. Larry The. William Ray Engvall Jr. (born July 27, ) is an American comedian and actor best known for . They have a daughter named Emily (born ), a graduate from the University of Release date: October 13, ; Label: Warner Bros. “My cousin gave me guozhong batan bill engvall daughter dating a drug Tyler Perry's Jennifer Shrader Lawrence (born August 15, ) is.
Blue Collar Comedy Tour[ edit ] Main article: Each of the 6 years of the tour were very successful and spawned 3 films, a satellite radio show, and a television show titled Blue Collar TV on The WB Network. Game show host[ edit ] On June 6,Engvall began a new chapter in his career as he took over as host of the re-launched Lingo on GSN.
Engvall had been a fan of Lingo when it aired a few years previously before ending inadmitting that his wife always beat him to the answers. I would love to have them on the show because it would be a blast. I would really dig that. The second week was Latin week and he saw some higher scores from the judges receiving a 21 for his Jive. A lot or a little? The parents' guide to what's in this TV show. Positive Messages The parents are devoted to each other and their kids. Typical family and marital issues -- like communicating with teens, balancing family and work, and handling family finances -- are addressed with humor.
Gender roles are fairly old-fashioned, with Mom doing the cooking and cleaning and Dad bringing home the paycheck, but the father does play an active role in raising the kids. The family often prays before meals, and parents and kids express their love for each other. Violence Sex Light sexual innuendo played for humor -- for instance, a teen walks in on her parents naked in their bedroom upper body nudity only, with the woman shown from behindand a father uses phallus-shaped vegetables cucumber, zucchini, etc.
When I tell my son to go take a shower, it can easily be 45 minutes before I hear the water start running. Do you got one like this? He gets up in his bathroom, 'cause he has go to the bathroom again. And I don't even think he has to go; I think he just enjoys the comfort of that seat. One night, I told him to go take a shower, and I didn't hear the water run for about an hour, and I said, "That is it!
It's a magazine about that hairy rat, I swear to God! And if you ever see it, pick it up. On the inside cover, it's a woman and a man, who publish this magazine, and they wrote this inscription: And he goes, "Hey, man, I'm getting a divorce. Can you spot me? So I go home, and I tell my wife, "Hey, Joey's getting a divorce. Is she cheating on him, is he cheating on her?
He didn't say, 'Hey, Bill, what do you think about me getting a divorce? This is where I go to get away from the honey-do list. I joke about it, fellas, but I tell ya, she runs that house.
And if you're a married guy, I ain't telling you nothing you don't already know. But if you're single, and you're thinking about getting married, listen up.
You ain't never gonna win the argument. If guys were a sports team, we'd be 0-fer. I love Slim-Jims so much, I once called their hotline. I swear to God. I told them, "I got your next billion-dollar idea.
Men love beer and Slim-Jims. So, what you need to do, is drill a hole in the middle of that Slim-Jim She hung up on me. Talking about what he wants at his funeral "And don't put a rose in my hand.
Send me to heaven with a slim-jim! That's how we lost your Uncle Pike. Boobs can make a 6-month old baby and a 65 year old man both act the same way. And I'm a big fan.Bill Engvall Comedy: Narrow Pads
Oh, man, I love 'em! And I ain't picky neither. I hate when I hear guys go "I don't like little boobs. Big boobs, little boobs, saggy boobs, perky boobs. You could have boobs that look like nanners, I don't give a damn! They're the perfect toy! You squish them, mush them, POOF!
The Bill Engvall Show TV Review
They come right back out! You can't even break 'em! Boobs can make a long trip seem short, make a bad day seem great.
Boss been chewing you out all day long. Ever eaten a worm? When did you ever eat a worm? This year, ladies and gentlemen, I was cool for 2 seconds of my life. I got to fly with the Air Force Thunderbirds.
Audience hoots and hollers You betcha! They called me up out of the blue, and they go, "Hey, we want you to fly with us. You stand for what America stands for. Be an honor to have you fly with us. The Movie [ edit ] She's online with her friends, and little boys are starting to call the house.
Oh, my God, we had a kid call the house at two in the morning. Oh, I lost it. I hear a phone ring and I'm like "Who's got a phone in the mountains?? Then my wife turns to me and goes, "Bill, you've got to be nice. Who applies for that job? Who says "I want to work in lost luggage"? You don't have a good day. That's like having a job emptying port-a-potties. You're just going to catch crap all day long. And I'm gonna say to him, "Boy, look at me. You see that little girl right there?
She's my only little girl, man. So if you have any. You get one piece every four to six weeks, you don't know what kind of shape that piece is gonna be in when you get it, but you still gotta pay the handling charges. Blue Collar Comedy Tour: One For the Road [ edit ] [about trampolines] I discovered two very important facts that day - Number one: The springs will pull the hair out of your legs, and Number two: Every single turn, she has a question.
Now, here's the problem. Sometimes her questions actually make sense. I don't have an answer for them. So, I have to that guy thing and go Pfft!
Bill Engvall Photos and Pictures | TV Guide
You ever hear your man do that, ladies? That means he doesn't know the answer, but he's thinking.
Here's Your Sign Live! Twenty years later, you're arguing just so they'll sleep in the other room. Remember that first year of marriage, when you went to the bathroom? Oh, lock the bathroom door, turn on the shower, because God forbid they knew you were going poo.
Twenty years later, that bathroom door is wide open Here, go sit down, I'll get you a beer, you can tell me all about it. While you were at your 'job'? And two, to tell you she wants to retake the test. I go, "what are you, stupid?