Finland Dating Guide: the ABC of Finnish Dating Culture – Her Finland
Finnish women are unique and to date one is unlike anything you've ever experienced before. Unlike other cultures, you can find plenty of ethnic men with a Finnish Finnish women tend to have a nice blend of all the eastern features that. So to prevent culture shock, take note of these 10 customs. To prevent you from innocently stepping on some Finnish toes, here are a few social no-goes to be aware of. This is a difficult one for most Westerners, as we all love to jump in with our If you set up a date with a Finn, they will hold you to it. In plain words it will be a bit shocking and awkward to understand how it all There really is no dating culture here other than online dating, hooking up at . This is not necessarily bad but initiative is what's usually lacking from Finnish dating.
For some reason, we ladies and yes, I also include us Finnish women are the experts in this field. As moping is a colossal turn-off, talk the situation through or opt for some me-time and come back spirits lifted. Most likely he has a car, a summer cottage, family and hobbies to pay for. At the start of a relationship, it is common in Finland to have your financial stuff separate for quite some time. Even better, if you want to try some of the things he loves. For example, a Finnish man may have a close relationship with nature.
It might be important for him to fish and hike in the wilderness. Even though this might be a little strange or even scary to you, see if you enjoy it too.
In the worst case scenario, you are a bit bored but get a nice dose of fresh air. Neither style is wrong. Most of us Finns have a need for space and silence, also within our families. Blending into a more communal culture can be quite a shock for a Finn.
Showing support is the best thing you can do. Thus, they are always prepared and dressed to kill when they go outside. In Finland, girls are taught the following: The man of your dreams will probably see you in horrible influenza, when you are too drunk and when you are delivering his babies. Conversing The conception that Finns are a reserved and taciturn lot is an ancient one and does not retain the same validity as it used to, certainly not with the younger generations.
Nevertheless, it is fair to say that Finns have a special attitude to words and speech: A Finn will carefully consider what he or she says and expect others to do so too.
Dating, Relationships, Cultural Norms - Finland Forum
He or she considers verbal agreements and promises binding, not only upon himself but upon the other party too, and he or she considers that the value of words remains essentially the same, regardless of when and where they are uttered. Visitors should remember that invitations or wishes expressed in a light conversational manner such as: Small talk, a skill at which Finns are notoriously lacking, is considered suspect by definition, and is not especially valued. Finns rarely enter into conversation with strangers, unless a particularly strong impulse prompts it.
As foreigners often note, Finns are curiously silent in the metro, the bus or the tram. In lifts, they suffer from the same mute embarrassment as everyone else in the world. However, a visitor clutching a map will have no trouble in getting advice on a street corner or in any other public place, since the hospitality of Finns easily overrides their customary reserve.
Finns are better at listening than at talking, and interrupting another speaker is considered impolite. A Finn does not grow nervous if there are breaks in the conversation; silence is regarded as a part of communication. Finns usually speak unhurriedly, even in their mother tongue the pace of newsreading on Finnish TV is a source of amusement for many foreignersand although many Finns are competent in several foreign languages, they may be wary of the speed at which these languages are spoken.
Nevertheless, Finns can become excited and voluble, given the right situation. Having once got to know a stranger moderately well, Finns are quite willing to discuss any topic; generally not even religion or politics are taboo.
Shared hobbies are a natural topic for conversation and exchange of opinions in Finland as elsewhere, and it can be easy to strike up a lively conversation with a Finn about culture and the arts on the one hand and about sports on the other. Sports is a particularly feasible topic because in recent years Finns have enjoyed success in sports other than the traditional long-distance running and winter sports: Golf has established itself securely especially among urban Finns, even though they are obliged to abandon this pastime for the winter months.
This deprivation is an eminently suitable topic for conversation on the part of a visitor who is familiar with the world of drivers and putters.
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Information technology The now ubiquitous mobile phone is revolutionizing the image of Finnish communication skills. The persistent, supposedly amusing ringing tones of the phones demonstrate how eager people are to talk to each other, especially when they are not face to face. One foreign journalist described a scene that he considered typically Finnish: A Finnish version of small talk? The use of mobile phones is governed in Finland, as indeed in other countries, by a loosely defined etiquette which forbids their use if disruptive or dangerous, so using a mobile phone is completely forbidden on aeroplanes and in hospitals.
During meetings it is inappropriate. In pubs and restaurants it may be regarded by many as irritating but it goes on regardless. At concerts, at the theatre and in church it is barbaric and considerate people switch their phones off in those places.
Quick Guide to Dating Finnish Guys
Whereas a few decades ago a visitor might report back home on an uncommunicative, reserved and introvert Arctic tribe, the more common view today is that of a hyper-communicative people who are already experiencing the future that some fear and others hope for: All over the world, the Internet and e-mail have radically changed how people find information and keep in touch, and Finland is no exception. For young people, using the ever-increasing range of IT applications is commonplace, and it is also an important factor in shaping youth culture.
Increasingly, politicians and corporate managers set up websites and maintain personal blogs to comment publicly on their lives and views. Finnish belongs to the small Finno-Ugrian language group; outside Finland it is understood and to some extent spoken in Estonia. And in Sweden, too, Finnish is spoken among the large number of Finnish immigrants. Finns take care of their linguistic communication by maintaining a wide range of foreign languages in the school curriculum.
English is widely spoken in Finland and in the business community some companies use it as their house language. German is no longer widely taught but many Finns in their 50s or older learned it as their first foreign language at school. French, Spanish and Russian have grown in popularity both in schools and among adult learners.
Membership of the European Union and the related practical and social demands have increased the need to study European languages, at least in the case of Finns who travel in Europe on business or are studying abroad. Educated Finnish speakers, particularly those working in the public sector, speak Swedish to some degree whilst almost all Swedish-speaking Finns speak Finnish too. The status of Swedish as the joint official language of mainland Finland can be seen in the bilingual names of public institutions and in street signs, the latter case depending on the percentage of minority language speakers resident in a given municipality, and in the Swedish-language programmes on radio and TV.
Swedish-speaking Finns have a distinctive culture, and their social mores are influenced by Scandinavian traditions moreso than amongst the Finnish-speaking majority. Names and titles When introducing themselves, Finns will say their forename followed by their surname. Although Finns are conscious and proud of any official titles they may have, they rarely mention these when introducing themselves.
In contrast, they do expect to be addressed by their title in professional and official contexts: Doctor Virtanen, Managing Director Savolainen, etc. The familiar form of address in Finnish i. However, young people still tend to address middle-aged or elderly people by the formal second person plural if they do not know the persons well.
It is relatively easy to get onto first-name terms with a Finn, especially if it is evident that the parties will continue to meet regularly for business or pleasure. However, it is felt appropriate that the use of first names is specifically and mutually agreed upon.
The use of first names is always proposed by the older or more senior person to the junior, or, in the case of equals, by the woman to the man; the agreement is enacted by shaking hands, making eye contact, with each party saying their first name aloud, and nodding the head. Raising a toast with schnapps, wine or champagne lends a festive air to the occasion. Apart from this, Finns are not nearly as demanding in remembering names as many other people are. It is not usual to address people by name when greeting them regardless of how familiar one is with them or in the course of a normal conversation.
Businessmen and persons in public office are expected to distribute business cards as a means of ensuring their name and title are remembered. There are no special rituals related to exchanging business cards in Finland. For a visitor, receiving a business card provides a convenient opportunity to ask how a name is pronounced or what a cryptic title might mean.
Greeting When meeting, Finns shake hands and make eye contact. Handshakes are brief and firm, and involve no supporting gestures. When greeting, the parties shake hands and make eye contact. A deep bow denotes special respect — in normal circumstances, a nod of the head is enough.
A Finnish handshake is brief and firm, and involves no supporting gestures such as touching the shoulder or upper arm. When greeting a married couple, the wife should be greeted first, except on a formal occasion where the hosts should first be greeted by the spouse to whom the invitation was addressed.
Children are greeted by shaking hands too. Embracing people when greeting them is rare in Finland. A man greeting someone in the street should raise his hat; in the cold of winter, a touch of the hand to the brim of the hat is enough. Finns can kiss as well as the next nation, but they rarely do so when greeting.
Friends and acquaintances may hug when meeting, and kisses on the cheek are not entirely unknown, although this habit is not generally found in rural areas. There is no special etiquette regarding the number of kisses on the cheek; however, most Finns feel that three kisses is going a bit far.
Men very rarely kiss each other in greeting, and never on the mouth in the manner of our eastern neighbours. Eating Finnish cuisine has western European, Scandinavian and Russian elements. Table manners are European. Breakfast can be quite substantial. Lunch is usually eaten between The once common long business lunches have shrunk to 90 minutes or two hours. Evening meals at home are eaten around In most restaurants, dinners are served from Many restaurants stop serving food about 45 minutes before they actually close, so it is worthwhile checking the serving times when booking a table.
Concerts and theatre performances usually begin at Restaurant menus and home cooking rarely involve food that western visitors would not be acquainted with.
Increased nutritional awareness has made the once heavy, fatty Finnish diet lighter, and the better restaurants can cater for a variety of dietary requirements.
Quick Guide to Dating Finnish Guys – Her Finland
Ethnic restaurants, constantly increasing in number, have added to the expanding choice. Beer and wine are drunk with restaurant food in the evening, but at lunchtime these days they feature very little, if at all. At a dinner party, the host determines the seating order if necessary. The guest of honour is seated to the right of the hostess or the host, if it is a men-only dinner. This is a seat dreaded by most Finns, since the guest of honour is expected to say a few words of thanks to the hosts after the meal.
It is not appropriate for guests to drink before this, unless the beginning of the meal is badly delayed. Finns seldom make speeches during a meal, but they do so on formal occasions. In such cases, the speeches are made between courses.
During the meal, the host may toast individual guests, or guests may toast each other, by raising their glasses and making eye contact. Once the toast is drunk, eye contact should be made again when lowering the glass to the table.
A meal normally concludes with coffee and postprandial drinks are served with it or immediately after. If the hosts allow smoking, this is the moment to bring out the cigars and cigarettes, unless of course the host has already allowed or suggested this earlier.
When leaving the table, the guests should thank the hosts briefly for the fare when they get the chance, regardless of whether the guest of honour has done so or not. Finns drink coffee anywhere and everywhere. More coffee per person is drunk in Finland than anywhere else in the world.
Finns consume the equivalent of slightly over ten litres of pure alcohol per person per year, which is close to the European average. Drinking habits mainly follow Scandinavian and European practices. There are fewer national characteristics than one might think, considering that Finns do have a reputation for drinking; and indeed binge drinking is fairly common, as it is throughout northern Europe and parts of the UK.
However, consumption of wine and beer, as opposed to spirits, has increased in recent years, and as a result more decorous drinking behaviour has become more common.
Finland Dating Guide: the ABC of Finnish Dating Culture
Consumption of alcohol at lunchtime is less common in the business world than it used to be, and in the public sector it is extremely rare. Alcohol consumption varies somewhat, according to socio-economic differences and, to some extent, by region.
The influence of central European or Mediterranean drinking habits is primarily visible among urban middle class young adults and slightly older Finns with tertiary education. The import and sale of wines and other alcoholic beverages is largely controlled by the state-owned Alko organisation, and private individuals can only buy alcoholic beverages in Alko shops, with the exception of medium strength beer and cider, which can be bought in food stores.
Alko is a major buyer of wines and stocks a wide and geographically representative selection of all qualities, including top labels. Many restaurants import their own wines directly from suppliers abroad.
In households wine is normally reserved for weekend meals, but meals prepared for guests or eaten in a restaurant usually involve wine. Often — and in the case of Swedish-speaking Finns, almost always — a meal is preceded by schnapps, a shot of vodka or aquavit in a tiny glass.
This is considered an integral part of cold fish courses, and absolutely essential with crayfish. Swedish-speaking Finns have a custom of enlivening the occasion with a line or two of a drinking song before each shot of schnapps.
Big dinner parties have an appointed toastmaster who determines the interval between shots and leads the singing. Finnish-speaking Finns have a less elaborate and less structured drinking etiquette, although there are schnapps songs in Finnish too.