A younger man dating an older woman | Ask MetaFilter
I've discussed dating out of your demographic with men and women alike, and while everybody has a lot to say on the subject of age, I'm of the. Anyhow i don't know the purpose of this thread, but i am dating a 38 Honestly being a 34yo guy (I don't act that old, trust me) I can tell you. Dating and Relationships . So the youngest person a 34 year old could date would be age 24 (34/2=17; 17+7=24). Think about why is he dating you?.
I would have given him another chance because I really like him. I love older men but it is almost impossible to find a MAN who is free of drama from their past, it is always fun and romantic at the beginning; but they have history and most of the times they are just repeating the same story over and over again. Reply Don on October 16, I am currently in an online relationship with a 38 year old lady.
I am 68, but a young healthy 68 year old. We are getting together later this month. We have had a lot of discussion about our age difference. She says consistently that age is just a number and if you are happy together, why not be together. We have a lot in common and ate going to go for it.
Reply Nathan Deeley on July 3, What about younger men? Seymoure on July 4, Perhaps they want them for 45 min in bed nothing more Nick Notas on July 7, We all have our own preferences and some women happy to like younger men, too. Many of the older women who desire younger men are for sexual purposes. They want to have an awesome sexual experience with. I obviously agree with Nick, to disagree would be denying what IS. Security and stability, which is over and above all the biggest motivator of women.
Fact is in western countries Europe and America a man has to quite wealthy to be able to date younger women where as in Asia or Latin America you just need to have a job. You act like its riding around on a bicycle. Reply Seymoure on July 6, Dear Sam, everything is relative. Reply Seymoure on July 9, Not at all Sam.
I'm 22 dating a 34 year old guy?
My fundamental point was women cannot help but to be attracted to security and stability and items and signals that suggest stability and security sure gets their attention.
You see my point? Just like you and I women notice them as well but unlike you and I their mind quickly extrapolates what they see with wealth, stability and the good life.
Sam on July 9, Yea, I see what you mean. It shows perceived social status which is attractive to women. Nick Notas on July 7, I disagree with your type of people theory — there are a lot more shades of grey in there. Most people are not black-and-white like that. They may go after what they want in certain areas of their life, in certain situations, or with certain people.
At many points in your life, you WILL look to or hesitate because of some external source for approval. Just look at the video of the guy with a Bugatti asking women straight out if they want to have sex with him. The more poverty you live in, the more important that security and status becomes.
But in places like the states and parts of Europe, you do NOT need to be wealthy at all to date hot girls. Some of the best guys I know with women are not traditionally attractive or wealthy. Personality and confidence go a long way. Yes, a girl sleep and date a wealthy guy. But if you want to ever have a woman who truly desires you and has a deep emotional connection for the long-term, you need more than that.
Seymoure on July 7, Agreed Nick. Reply Seymoure on July 4, It all comes down to what one brings to the table. The man brings safety, stability, security and ability to provide for the children and the woman brings youth, beauty and sex. Then once you provide the security the other things such as your good looks, good sex, help with cleaning etc. Women can put up with the lack of bonuses if security is there but not the other way around.
Reply Mark on July 4, These last two comments are very misleading in my experience. And are also phrased in a vrey one-sided way. Greed is a common human trait, which is easily participated in by both men and women. Happiness is a much more universal goal, and there are many more ways that people persue it than a search for stability, influenced by biology.
After a certain point the goal of just heaping up more and more wealth only interests those with a certain mindset. Yes, we all want stability, and to not stress over being able to afford things that we want, or want to provide for our children, like a good education.
Then whether you are a decent human being, passionate about something, and able to care for others becomes everything. There are billionaires who will go bankrupt this year. His wife is a 10 by ANY standards. He will still be one of the most open, genuine and passionate people I have ever known. And it is clear why his wife loves him. Wealth is not stability! If you think it is you are just kidding yourself. Actually most crime and murder is committed by the poor mostly amongst each other and the fastest way to help the needy is by not being one of them.
Mark on July 8, Nope. You completely misunderstood me. I dated recently with 22 year old girl — at first it was lots of fun, but after a couple of dates I got bored. Nick Notas on July 7, Hey Lithuanian, I generally find women women in their mid-to-upper twenties the most attractive, too.
Ansshuman on July 13, Hey Nick, I am from India can you suggest some tips how to attract any women or seduce any women in Indian circumstances? It is one of the things that I have struggled with. I am 43 and make the most connections with women that are Women my age would look at me with disdain, I even had one woman my age spread a bunch of rumors about me regarding this female.
This deeply hurt me and I wondered if there was something wrong with me. This article got me to remember all my anthropology classes and this makes perfect sense. Women my age are kind of boring to me.
Older Men Who Like Younger Women Aren't Creeps
I like to dance, love new music, technology etc. Sitting at home and watching TV are just not an option for me. I just feel I have more in common with younger women. Its not just a physical attraction thing. I am not going to worry about it anymore. I like what I like and if she is consenting, like you indicated. Who really cares what anyone thinks, as long as we are happy in our relationship.
There is nothing wrong with finding a something woman attractive. If you read Daring Greatly you will see that we all have our vulnerabilities. For women seeing an older established man with a younger woman has the ability to make many women very insecure. I have a great friend who is a 24 year old smoking hot girl. And I'm very definitely better in bed than I was in my 20s, not through magic tricks or kama sutra style techniques, it's just a question of knowing better what I want, being more dominant in bed and also at the same time more relaxed about it.
Obviously there are some issues due to the age difference, the main ones I would say are: I find it very hard to dance to club music as something seems to have changed the last couple of years, the beat seems to change randomly mid-track now or there are off-beats or skips which really throws me: The friends thing is probably the single biggest issue.
Basically it means we are happiest by ourselves, or with just one or two good friends who are understanding of our relationship. So now, if a group of friends wants to go out, we would usually tend each to do our own thing that evening. In fact, the only thing this tells me is that you are into this particular 31 year old woman.
It could, maybe, suggest that you're more into 31 year olds than other women. If you really need to be older than your lady, just wait until you're 32 and start hitting on the 31 year olds.
Ta da, problem solved. Or you could realize you're being ridiculous and ask this one out now. Live your life, man. A week later he turned 21 and 2 weeks after that I was It didn't last, but he's still one of my favorite people in the world. We still root for each other. And it wasn't because of our ages that it didn't work out. But even if it was, that doesn't mean it wouldn't have been worth it. But the fact that it concerns you and you have to ask this question says to me, pretty strongly, that you personally shouldn't date this woman.
They have been together for 37 years and are happy by all accounts. So yeah, it works. Whomever started that cougar and milf shit should die in a fire. As a year old, I dated a year old. In all cases, it was two people being attracted to each other, not two numbers.
Just be open and honest, listen to both your heart and your mind, and it is hard for things to go too wrong. My wife is 5 years older than I am. We met and knew within 3 days that we were meant for each other, and we've been married for 30 years.
I never cared a bit about the age difference. She, on the other hand, never seemed to get over the age gap. Thus, we only lasted a couple of months.
But, had she been OK with the gap as I wasthe relationship may have lasted a good bit longer. TLDR - Age difference is only a problem if you think it is. And honestly, it's normal to freak out about this stuff even if you are super-enlightened. I consider myself super-feminist, but still had this idea in my head that women don't date younger men, because they're less mature, and make worse relationships.
My fiance reminded me that we share the same cultural touch points. Y craze that lasted all of about five minutes? That said, while it's normal to worry about it briefly, if you stick with these concerns, it might mean that there are some lingering insecurities.
I've done it at 30 and She was a little uncomfortable with the idea for the first month, worrying that maybe she was too old for me, but it turned out to be fine. We just enjoyed the hell out of each other.
Question any assumption that requires you to judge a woman negatively for being a woman and doing the same damn thing as you. In other words, either a five year age difference between consenting adults is creepy or it isn't. The older party being a woman doesn't somehow make it wrong, that's a sexist double standard and it's bullshit. Think of it this way: Does that sound like any kind of healthy or happy way to approach a relationship? Women are people, just like you. She was 42 and he was 30 when they met at work.
They fell in love and were partners; they had two sons and raised them. They were together for 21 years. I guess you'd have to ask Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins.
We lasted 10 great years together. When I was 42, my boyfriend was We made a great couple, and were together for years as well.
In both relationships, I very much felt we were equals. Two people, well met, who happened to have an age gap. The only times it got twitchy was when we'd go out to bars, and the guy would get carded, and the doorman's face would contort in confusion, trying to decide which would be less awkward: To answer your question: Magic 8 Ball says: The cougarMILF protection squad has yet to come knocking at our door.
Seriously, not only is the five year age difference not an issue, but 31 is not old by any stretch of the imagination - except that which has decided that 30 year old women are past their expiration date and everyone past that point needs pity and wrinkle cream. This is the segment of our society that sells magazines telling women to look younger and telling men that younger women are more valuable.
Don't listen to it. It's not that it's not okay to date them, I'm just not into them. And maybe if I got to know them I would change my mind, but just from looking at them, I can appreciate a good looking year old, but I am just not attracted to them. So ask her out first, see how it goes, and don't overthink the age thing.
Hopefully she doesn't think the same way I do. Which leads me to believe that some single guy wrote this on a dating site because he can't meet someone. Is that really who you want to believe? I'm a 31 year old female. If some year old dude referred to me as a cougar, I'd probably smack him right upside the head. Ask her out if you are ok with dating an older woman. Older women are awesome because we're well established, are independent, have careers, cool interests and do fun stuff.
Some of us even have accepted ourselves and our bodies for what they are and are over the phase of trying to be something we're not.
We're awesome because we're confident, fun and know ourselves pretty well and are comfortable in our own skin.
Age doesn't really enter into it at all.
22 Year old female dating a 38 Year old man
One of these relationships hasn't worked out because year-old Guy A is fairly immature and insecure, but that doesn't have much to do with his age--I know year-old men who are equally immature and insecure, and year-old Guy B is perfectly mature and secure. I'm not sure what you think "31 years old" means or looks like, but I don't look or act much differently than I did when before I crossed that magical line into my 30s that doesn't actually mean anything at all, and when I am out with year-old men no one notices the small age difference.
Most people assume we are roughly the same age because we are! I think commenters above have already covered the sadness and wrongness of the myth that there is something wrong or less-desirable about "older women.
I am not sure that I see that anywhere in your question. Do not let people like this drag you down to their level. Only qualified for retail jobs