INFJ female dating INTJ male | INFJ Forum
Sensitive INFJ. Emotionless INTJ. Sounds like a match made in heaven, right? Let's look at some of the dynamics at play in an INTJ INFJ relationship. An in-depth analysis of INTJ relationships and INTJs' compatibility with other While INFJs are strong in extraverting their judgments, INTJs can be even more. ENFP Compatibility; INFJ Compatibility; Pros and Cons of an INFJs are also often drawn to other IN types (INTJ, INFP, and INTP), also known.
I had not even considered his personality type or how compatible we may be because it all went very smoothly.
INTJ Relationships, Love, & Compatibility
From my own empirical evidence, we are very compatible, share similar values and we generally have the same approach to life. The INTJ boyfriend will be reading a book on one side of the room and I will be truly demolishing noobs on league of legends.
I do not like big groups. He is a lot more social that I am and has different groups of friends the mind boggles. He gets this and has always gone out of his way to make sure I am not in a situation like that, or if I have to be, that I am not there longer than necessary. When meeting his best friend, I am aware that he agave him a talking to to not freak me out. Turns out his bestie was an INFJ and we got on rather well!
We take turns talking and are both really good listeners. On this front, we get on like a house on fire. I do have to nudge him every now about communication because he sometimes seems to rely on me bringing things up before he lets it rip.
Intuition-Intuition We enjoy discussing big ideas and solving the worlds troubles over dinner. We have similar views on the big things and occasionally disagree.
I appreciate the viewpoint he brings to the conversation as he is very rational and everything seems to be black and white to him sometimes, which boggles my righteous, overly humanitarian mind. We enjoy talking about the future. Him more so than me as I appear to be the risk averse one.
I have attributed this to the ordinary fears of an INFJ when in any intense relationship.
We do seem to lack interest in everyday living. I cannot say that I spend that much time obsessing over the ironing or the washing.
Mind you, until earlier this year, my dear boyfriend had existed on this earth without owning an iron. We are both young professionals and I suspect a large part of our desire to succeed in our careers is so that we can hire a few assistants in later life.
INTJ Relationships, Love, & Compatibility
Thinking-Feeling So this is where we start to diverge. Me and my boyfriend are both introverted intuitive types. However, we externalise our introverted intuitive perceptions differently. The primary difference comes down to Thinking vs Feeling. For the majority of the time, our temperaments are similar. Everything can be packaged in his little Thinker head. He is one of the few people I know who can take criticism and make an action plan from it without taking offence.
I call him Action Plan Man. He tackled the problem with military precision and would completely phase out for an hour a day whilst completing the mission.
- INFJ female dating INTJ male
- The Surprising Thing About Dating an INTJ, as an INFJ
He asked for my input throughout the whole process and he took all my feedback well and continued on his little mission.
I cannot speak for him on this matter without tooting my own horn. Sometimes I notice how straightforward with me he is and have to remember not to take offence because a large part of the internalisation is to do with INFJs being sensitive to all emotions.
So when my thinker boyfriend says something bluntly without meaning anything ill at all, it always evokes a larger than expected reaction from me. In this respect I do believe that this is where we are well balanced. Between us we are ablate gain a lot of different perspectives before making important decisions. I do not like conflict and sometimes will go to great lengths to avoid this. It sometimes makes the situation more complicated than normal.
We normally just laugh it off.
Why the ENFP and INFJ Are Perfect for Each Other
There is a lot of affection in the relationship. I think he clocked on early on that this was my language of love and he has been exemplary. Likewise, I also have to be very straightforward with him about my feelings as this is the way he receives my show of affection better.
Judging-Judging We like to use calendars to organise ourselves.
If it is not in our calendars, it is not happening. The other sends an invite and we accept or decline accordingly. It really is that simple.
This may inspire them to gather as many facts and self-help strategies as they can regarding human psychology and relationships. While there is certainly nothing wrong with doing so, it may not always remedy their predicament in the way they might expect.
For one, INTJs with a history of relational difficulties can be prone to attribute those failures to psychological problems in their partners, thereby failing to see their own shortcomings. While not necessarily their fault, this should comprise at least as much of their relational attention as trying to see and diagnose problems in their partners.
To be fair, accurate self-evaluation can be a problem for all J-types, since their preferred mode of Judging Fe or Te is directed outwardly rather than inwardly. This is one reason why typology can be so useful for INTJs, as well as other types.
The Surprising Thing About Dating an INTJ, as an INFJ – The Durk Web
One of the hallmarks of Fi is a desire to preserve and defend the uniqueness of the individual. Related to a strong concern for the individual is the Fi desire to aid the weak, helpless, and marginalized of society. This is why IFPs, for instance, can often be found helping the homeless, working with children with special needs, protecting endangered species, etc.
Once we add Fi into the mix, it is not hard to see how INTJs might be attracted, even if unconsciously, to rescuing and fixing those who seem needy or helpless. The relationship then becomes a sort of psychotherapeutic forum, with the INTJ working to analyze, diagnose, and treat his wounded partner.
It zeroes in on the unique features of the individual and grows deeply attached to those qualities. While INTJs may not experience the consistent strength of feeling that FP types do, they are nonetheless influenced by the less conscious workings of Fi, which helps inspire loyalty, love, and commitment. This makes it a highly alluring function, powerful enough to inspire a fierce and protracted tug-of-war with the dominant function.
Money also relates to status, another Se-related desire. They may, for instance, feel forced to perform unfulfilling work that fails to utilize their Ni-Te gifts.
Or, they may struggle when the quality of a product or accuracy of information is compromised for the sake of marketability. INTJs also hate having to act before their intuition has prompted them to do so. All of this can make the work life of INTJs rather miserable as they struggle to find a compromise between their Ni and Se concerns. Even the idea of compromise can be loathsome to INTJs, since their idealism and perfectionism are so pronounced.
This perfectionism tends to be most acute when they attempt to directly control Se outcomes, such as when making art, performing, or obsessing over money or status. When functioning healthily in Ni, however, they rarely fall into the obsessive grip of perfectionism.
With that said, pairing with an SFP rarely brings lasting satisfaction to INTJs, since, as introverts, their wholeness must come from the inside out, rather than vice-versa.